Break-ups

We all have or will have to deal with a break-up at some point in our lives, be it a temporary or permanent one. As the name suggests, something generally gets broken; a friendship, a close bond or a heart. A mutual break-up may be easier to handle but it will essentially still hurt for the simple fact that there is still a lost. You may miss spending time with the person just hanging out or miss something about them or the way they did things like the way they laughed or smiled. Everytime you think about it, it will hurt.

Okay fair enough, that happens and you can live with that because you were part of the decision to break-up, but what happens in the case that there was a big falling out and it was a one sided break-up where only one person made the decision to break up? In this case it probably is immensely painful for the 'dumpee' (person being dumped). The thing about the dumping is that the person doing the dumping doesn't care much about how they go about doing it and this is how the break-up becomes even more painful. It's a break-up, Yes, but remember this is someone you once cared about. All that said, there is a good way and a bad way to dump people.

I'm going to list the top 5 worst ways to dump someone starting from number 5 to the worst way to dump someone with its corresponding possible interpreted message by the 'dumpee'.

5: AN EMAIL- "I don't feel like hearing you or seeing you so I think I can say what I have to say right here."

4: A TEXT- "One text is enough for me to say what I gotta say to you, just so you know I done!"

3: MESSAGE BY FRIEND- "I can't be bothered with you anymore so I'm sure my friend can deliver my message without me having to waste any more of my time or effort on you."

2: FACEBOOK- "I'll just change my status on facebook from 'in a relationship' to 'single' or to 'in an open relationship' and all my friends on facebook can see I'm available and I guess you can see too."

1: PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT- "Why only just tell you when I can announce it to everyone so everyone knows? I can just do it at a party or something so that all our friends get the info the same time."

The Meaning of Words

All words have meaning. A feeling, an expression, a thought, an idea, or just something; they all have a word or words that represent it as such. Regardless of whether or not words may have synonyms, each word in itself has its own unique meaning. Think about it; why would there be two words to represent the exact thing? They may have similar meanings, but never the same. That said, many of us misuse words and this causes a problem, because when we use words out of context we take away from the meaning of that word.

A lot of the mix up happens when we’re trying to express something abstract like feelings because it’s not as easy as saying “this is a book” and knowing that that is what it is. With feelings, everything becomes a little more complex; however there are still words to represent each feeling or emotion. Let’s take a look at the concept of ‘love’.

We all probably have/have had feelings for someone at some point in time and it’s times like these that when we want to tell the person how we feel that we start throwing words around. We tell the girl/guy that we just met how we like them when really and truly we are just attracted to them. Then when we do get to know them and now like them, we tell them how much we love them. You see how the misuse of these words causes problems? Because when we use a word to mean something it is not, when we get to what that word means we have to find another word because it feels wrong to use the same word when we know the feeling is different. So question; what happens when you love that person? What do you tell them then? Well this is where the phrase “I love you so much” is used. All you can do now is create different degrees of love. Alternatively, which is totally nonsensical, some of you would say “I love you more than words can even explain”. The thing is- Words CAN explain! That’s why words have meanings.

So, if we use words correctly and in context, it would save us from having to coin silly phrases to express what one word was meant to represent.

Say what you mean.

The Box! Maybe it’s time we think outside.

Okay, here’s a cliché we’ve all heard many times before; “think outside the box”. What does this really mean? Many people interpret this to mean that you should look at things from a different angle. That is the general idea, however let’s break it down; let’s go deeper into it. What is a box? A box is a container. It contains stuff. It’s a set size and can only hold so much. In other words, it’s limited.

When it’s time for us to think, we would rather think within that ‘box’. Most of us prefer our thoughts to be in the safety of being the ‘norm’ and accepted, i.e. for our views and ideas to be trapped; because that’s exactly what happens. Every society is ruled by these ‘norms’ and accepted views but everyone has the right to their own opinion, so why should your opinion, belief or view be limited to just those in the ’box’? Or do you prefer to live in the world you were given? Change will always occur, but we have the power to influence it; all that’s needed is a vivid imagination.

Many of the impossibilities of the past have become realities for us now. Why? Because someone was brave enough to explore outside the ‘box’! They could have just accepted what was; but then things would be the same.

The most important word is ‘think’. This is where the power lies. We all have that gift. I’m guessing the saying “great men think alike” was probably just “men think”. The “great” and “alike” were added to represent that it is the ‘great men’ who dare to think outside the ‘box’.

What do you think?

How can I be 20 and a virgin?

I’m a 20 year old guy and yes, I’m still a virgin. In this day and age most people don’t get past 16 without having sex, but honestly I don’t see why. I’m a virgin by choice. The way I see it, it is and always will be ‘mind over matter’. The mind is a very powerful tool; we don’t have to ‘do’ just because we get some crazy urge to. We desire what we want and do what we can, but we don’t ever do what we should or crave what we need. Well we do crave what we need; i.e. what we think we need. But why sex? And why when we are so young? What about sex will change when we’re older?

People start having sex because they realize all their friends are doing it and it’s supposed to be “mind-blowing”. I’ve been told many times that I don’t know what I’m missing. Of course I don’t! How can you miss something you never tried? If I never knew about cotton candy, I wouldn’t go around saying “Oh my goodness, I really need some cotton candy right now”! Would I? Nope.

What I don’t understand is why so many of us try so hard to fit in and do what everyone is doing. No one these days knows about individuality and having a mind for oneself. If you want to dress like everyone else and do what everyone else is doing, what is going to make you different? How will you stand out?

It seems like we are afraid of being labeled or just being the odd-man-out. There really isn’t anything wrong with waiting. It’s not like there’s a sign on your forehead saying “I’m a virgin! I’m not cool”. Look at it this way; no one can tell by looking. I’m cool, I have quite a few friends and I’m more often than not the life of the party when I need to be but I’m sure you wouldn’t have guessed I was a virgin either. I would love to bungee jump, sky dive and even swim with some sharks. All I’m saying is that you can use your imagination; there are a lot cooler things to do right now than to care about having sex. That’s just me.

Don't Throw!

At some point in our lives, we've all been told not to throw things at people. Of course we know doing that is wrong, but what I never got was the reasoning they all used for telling us that.

Have you ever heard this or something similar? "Stop throwing things at people, you might knock out one of their eyes!". Seriously? You honestly think that if I threw something at someone it's going to knock out their eye? Ok for arguments sake, let's not worry about the knocking out and just focus on hitting one of the eyes. Have you ever seen an eye? Not very big is it? I didn't think so either! So what are the chances of you getting even remotely close to someone's eye when you hit them with an object? Don't get me wrong! It is wrong to be throwing things at people but instead of giving us that reason, just tell us not to do it because we might hit them in the head. That's about 100 times a bigger target than an eye and about 100 times more believable that it can happen so we might stop as opposed to continuing throwing things because in your head you know there's almost no way you could hit one of the eyes because you aren't that good.

How does this work? Where are the buttons?

Our mobiles, our TV’s and our computers- their displays are all getting bigger and bigger! A display is one of those things that as it gets bigger, it gets better. Everyone loves the idea of having a big-screen TV to enjoy high quality movies on or a mobile phone with a huge screen to enjoy cool apps. As technology develops, along with the screens getting larger on these devices, the buttons used to control these devices are becoming smaller, to the point that they’re becoming scarce. All that’s left now is the huge screen, and that’s the only way we have to interact with the device.

This actually isn’t such a bad idea- just touch the screen. It seems like a really cool way to interface with my phone or computer. If you think about it, before any of us could roll around a mouse and click it or even type on a keyboard, we were all pushing and poking stuff with our fingers when we were little. Why can’t we still do that now? It’ll be fun! How cool would it be to just touch what you wanted to select as opposed to having to scroll to it then to click on it? It would be easy, wouldn’t you say? And even a lot more fun?

Touch-screen technology can even bridge the technological gap between the different generations. A toddler can play games with and learn using a touch-screen computer and similarly a grandparent can use the same computer to send e-mails, browse the web and even edit photos.

We should all get up to the time get our own cool touch screen devices. My phone doesn’t have a touch-screen but when people ask me if it has, I always say yes- you can touch it; but nothing will happen.

Ever wondered why on a 24hr clock it never gets to 24:00?

We know that the end of one day is the start of the next; therefore the minute after 23:59 should be the same as the minute before 00:01, true? Good. So that means 24:00 is the same time as 00:00. So why don’t we ever use 24:00 after 23:59? Isn’t it weird that a 24hr clock never goes as far as 24:00? It doesn’t seem weird to you? Alright! How about this? Count to 24, aloud. Finished? Good. What number did you start with? It was 1 and not 0, right? Thought so! And how about the last number you called? What was it? 24? Correct! So if you count to 24 and never start at ZERO, why does the clock have to start at 00:00? Can’t the clock start at 00:01 and end at 24:00? Wouldn’t that make a lot more sense? Think about it.

More! More! More! ...but when will more be too much?

Over the past few decades, technology has increasingly played a major role in mankind’s advancement. The development of technology has made things easier to use, simpler to understand and, faster and more efficient to operate. Man, as we develop at this rapid pace, try to find options in order to make things more easily accessible. Simple things in our everyday lives have been made simpler as technology adapts to meet our desires. An alarm; its purpose was to alert us letting us know it was a specific time. Now, an alarm will alert us and vibrate because we needed ‘more’, and then on top of that it will ‘snooze’ because we wanted the option to be alarmed but still have ‘more’ time to rest. Doesn’t the snooze option contradict the initial purpose of the alarm? You wanted to be up at a specific time but because you had the option, you chose to go back to sleep until the alarm goes off again. What happens if you had an important meeting to attend? That ‘extra’ sleep you got just made you late.

Similarly with communication, telephones were made to communicate with people who weren’t closeby. However, the telephone wasn’t enough because it wasn’t mobile so man created cell phones. Why stop there? We wanted more options to fit every need and to make it even easier to communicate with each other, so now we can; call, SMS, MMS, PIN, ‘bbm’, email, video call and IM each other. All these options will keep us connected but the thing is, now we would sit in a room with each other and the only communication will be that which is occurring in the virtual world. Is that the price we have to pay for convenience, where I’ll rather text before I sit and have a conversation with you?

We always want more. More time, more memory, more security. Your house is locked and unlocked electronic by entering a code, your car is unlocked and started by a chip in your hand and your office is unlocked by a finger print scan. What happens the day you wake up and the keypad to enter the code at home goes bum, the chip in your hand stops working and all your fingers are swollen? Are you willing to pay that price for more?

Are we REALLY bad-behaved?

Just a little while ago the conduct of the youth has been under heavy criticism. It was even said that the youth of today are ‘bad behaved’ and he also added that it’s at a point now that it’s a matter of national security. The question I want to ask is, is it really that bad? Is it that all of us are bad? No, I can confidently say that’s not the case, but they are those few that may choose the wrong path and then influence their peers to follow.

However, the question we must all ask is, where does this all start? I don’t believe people are born ‘bad behaved’. They have to be taught how to behave; like anything else, a child will learn by example. That said, if a child isn’t shown right from wrong or taught how to make positive decisions, can all the blame be on us? If we can get away with ‘foolishness’ and ‘slackness’ at home, wouldn’t we then feel it is okay to do it anywhere?

So what happens then when we go to school? Do we then behave ourselves? No, we behave the same way, the only way we know how to behave. A child that was never taught about respect will not know how to respect themselves and then in turn, respect those in authority and their peers. I asked many students what type of bad behaviour occur at their schools and the general response was; rudeness to teachers, abusive language and fighting. Sounds to me like a lack of respect.

Now here’s the thing, these things obviously aren’t right but what I learned from asking the students is that these things don’t occur frequently and they are habitually done by a few. All the kids aren’t bad. So to say it’s a matter of national security is taking it a little too far. It’s true that the matter must be dealt with but staying back and pointing fingers and saying all the youth are bad isn’t going to solve the problem.

Whitney Houston once said in a song, “the children are our future, teach them well and let them lead the way”. That is what needs to be done. We can only learn if we are taught. Show us and guide us and we should be fine but everyone must play their part.

We (the youth) can’t afford to continue along this path anyhow, because what we do now will affect our future. Remember, it is our future.

The few of us that are on the wrong path now only need a hand from the rest of us because as far as some of them know, what they are doing is right. So for those of you that know better, don’t just sit back and allow your peers to continue along the wrong path. For you to stand by and watch; doing nothing is encouraging it and it isn’t solving the problem.

For all of you guys, listen to what Michael Jackson once said. “If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change”.